Love and Addiction
Just a quick post to point out that the book Love and Addiction is now out on Kindle. original hardback copies are about £200 so £6.15 is a good deal! If you use amazon prime you can borrow it from the library. I have not read this book yet, but have heard really good things about it, and have downloaded it. It was considered really revolutionary when it came out in the 1970’s and the issues that it raised are still being debated today.
It is important to point out that the conclusions that the authors reached are now being embraced by the more progressive thinkers in the field of addiction. I have read five of Stanton’s other books and have found them really useful. I was some distance into my recovery, when I heard about him, (through Ilse Thompson when she had the Stinkin-Thinkin Blog updating daily, who co wrote Recover with him), which was a shame as I feel that I would have had a much better start and would not have been taken in by some of the inappropriate methods of the 12 step world, if I had read these before. “The Diseasing of America” book really helped me dump some of the things I had learnt at AA and other books such as “7 tools to beat addiction” gave me new methods to work with that actually helped, and were about as far away from the powerless, “higher power” rubbish as you can get.
I think whatever method of recovery you choose, it is important to find out as much information about the subject as possible. Things are improving in the UK with more CBT methods being suggested by the NHS, but many are tempted to just go to AA as that is the only thing they have heard of. I went there because it was pretty much the only thing I had heard of and was put off other solutions when I asked about them in my second AA meeting(that did not go down well at my Joys meeting!). In fact, apart from a bit of (fellowship although a lot was with dysfunctional people in AA), the main thing I learn from meetings was that recovering was not going to be straight forward and I was going to have to make some big changes and work hard for a while. I made a good decision, when I decided to do as much research for myself as possible, and not simply sit in the rooms, reciting those AA phrases like a Parrot, without any thought for what I was doing. I found the methods talked about in these books really helped compared to the “solution” from Chapter five of the Big Book, which is simply faith healing and becomes an even more bizarre method when AA members try to distort the text and pretend it is non religious. Does anybody think praying to a “group of drunks”( a popular AA God!) or even a lightbulb is a worthwhile method, (this was suggested to me by an AA member with 25 years “sobriety”). They even have the cheek to call people who recover with more sane solution “dry drunks”!.
I have recently started reading the “Handbook of Alcoholism Treatment approaches effective alternatives“. This book is aimed at professional addiction specialists rather than me, but I have found it really interesting. It really does make it clear that AA is not suitable for a lot of people and talks about how many who have left AA respond better to methods such as Rational Recovery. It mentions that Binging is a problem in relapse for AA members compared to those who use other methods, and talks about the low success rate of the 12 step model which it rates in the low 30’s in the list of best to worst treatments, despite it being widely used. I will write more about these books when I have time. They are probably worth looking at if you are thinking of going to a rehab as they will give you a lot of food for thought over which method would be more useful and save you wasting a lot of time on money., if you are not going to respond to the religious AA solution.
Stanton Peele has his own site here and it is really worth a look http://www.peele.net